


Milkovich Family Values

by grumblesandmumbles



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Domestic Mickey Milkovich, F/M, Gen, Ian Gallagher and Mandy Milkovich are Best Friends, Ian's back from the Army, M/M, Mickey Milkovich as a Good Father, Mickey Uses His Words, Mickey and Svetlana are friends, Shameless
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-07 14:18:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3175838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grumblesandmumbles/pseuds/grumblesandmumbles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Starts about a month after Ian left in 3x12. Not canon-compliant.</p>
<p>A reimagining of Mickey and Svetlana working as a team long before their newfound unity in season 5.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"This isn't what either of us want. You know it, and I know it. Let's just walk away clean."

With Ian gone, Mickey constantly felt like he was suffocating. Stuck in a house with Terry, in a bullshit marriage with his pregnant whore wife. Every day when he woke up, it was like a weight was on his chest. He knew that something had to change. That he couldn't live like this forever. Mickey was talking to Svetlana. No, Mickey was pleading with her. She had come home from Garden Spring Spa and found him a drunken mess laying on their bed. This was becoming a more common occurrence. It was either she found him like this, or she didn't find him at all. They had been married for all of a month. She was pregnant but wasn't showing. One could easily pretend she wasn't, which is what Mickey did to get through each day.

"I can't be a father. I can't raise this baby. This isn't supposed to be my life. Is this what you want? To have a baby and be married to a guy who... a guy who..." Mickey stammers over the words. He still can't just bring himself to say it. And really, that's what got him into this situation in the first place. He substitutes the best he can. "A guy who doesn't feel that way for you?" Svetlana apprises him, eyes cold. He never really understood what people meant when they talked about the Soviet attitude, the Soviet mentality, until he met Svetlana. The way she could pick him apart with her stare. How you could try and try, and not get a read about what she really thinks or feels about anything. He thought he had been good at hiding his feelings and emotions. She was a master. You only knew how she felt if she wanted you to know.

"Please, just get an abortion. I'll pay for it. Then we won't owe each other anything. We can even stay married, I don't care. It's just a piece of fuckin' paper. You can get your green card and then move on with your life. I just... I can't do this. I just want to leave this place. There's nothing here for me."

He almost doesn't believe it when he sees her expression soften. She moves from her place in the doorway and sits down next to him on the bed. She regards him more gently than normal. "Is this about the orange boy that was here that day?" This is the first time they've spoken about that. Mickey hesitates before giving a slight nod. Svetlana slowly reaches out and rests her hand on top of his. He looks up at her but she's staring at the wall, thinking. "You know, the funny thing is I don't even like men. I don't know if it's because of my job, or if I never did, but I hate the penis. Ugly fucking skin stick. Always trying to get in where it doesn't belong. It's not fair that this happened, but I can't get an abortion. Terry would kill us if he ever found out. I don't expect everything from you. I know you did not choose this. But I don't choose this either." 

She finally looks over and meets Mickey's eye. He whispers, "We can always just tell people you lost it. They wouldn't have to know the truth." She gets up and moves to the dresser, looking for something to sleep in, not responding. Mickey bites his lip, convinced he pushed it too far. He decides he should just leave this topic alone. He kicks off his shoes and rolls over on the bed to face the wall. He hears Svetlana rustling around as she changes her clothes and feels the blanket pull back as she slides into the bed with him. He's about to reach out and turn off the lamp when she finally speaks. "I can't get an abortion, I don't believe in it. But if you wanted to leave here, I could go with you. And we could make it work, like friends. Stay married for awhile, do our own things separately, and then just divorce. Happens all the time right? All I want from you is to not leave me alone with baby." Mickey sits up and looks at her. "You think we could make it work?" Svetlana shrugs. "We can try. In America, people love to try, yes?" Mickey replies, "Sure... I guess." Svetlana clucks her tongue, an odd habit that his mother used to do, and the noise reassures him in a strange way. "Let's talk about this in the morning," she says. He turns off the light and drifts off to sleep.

The next morning, Mickey and Svetlana have the house to themselves. Terry took the other brothers out of town on a run, and Mandy went out last night with Kenyatta and hadn't been back home yet. They start discussing ideas about where they can relocate to. "I have an uncle that lives out near Pittsburgh. He can probably get me a job in the steel mills or something. I think they make decent money. I can call him, see what he says." Svetlana nods her agreement at this idea and Mickey takes out his cell phone. He goes into the bedroom for some privacy while he talks. He finally returns and says, "Good news. My uncle thinks he can get me a maintenance or janitorial job at one of the colleges down there. He also said there's a neighborhood near one of the colleges that has a lot of Russian people, so you might be able to find some sort of office job yourself. And he said the rent in that neighborhood is decent and that we could probably find an apartment pretty easily. He's going to make some phone calls and get back to me." Svetlana nods at this. She's actually kind of excited, although she'll never show that. She prefers to remain stoic. It's her biggest strength. She thinks it would be nice to get out of Chicago and see something new, put this life behind her. She knows her life with Mickey isn't real, not exactly, but she thinks that they can form a real friendship and use each other for what they each need. Having a friend would be nice. Svetlana always prepares for the worst in everything, her life hasn't lent her any reason to do anything else, but she's cautiously optimistic that this could really work. An hour or so later, Mickey's phone rings and he practically runs for it. Svetlana watches as he gets a glint of hope in his eye, something she had never imagined she would see in him. He jots down some information and they hang up. He looks at her and actually smiles. "Get your shit packed, we're out of here this weekend."

When the weekend finally rolls around, Mickey has Colin and Iggy help him pack up the U-Haul truck he rented for he and Svetlana's meager possessions. It's about a six hour drive, so Mickey wants to get on the move early enough that they have some time to settle in when they finally make it there. When they're about to leave, Mandy finally emerges from her room to say goodbye. She wraps her arms around Mickey's neck and whispers to him, "I'll miss you, but if you tell anyone, I'll deny it." Mickey squeezes her and nods his agreement. He gets a lot of back slaps and handshakes from his brothers. Terry couldn't be bothered to see them off, and Mickey is relieved. They pull away from the curb, waving at the Milkoviches lined up outside. As they pull away, Mickey says to Svetlana, "I just need to make a quick stop before we get on the road." She nods in response, not really paying attention. He drives a few blocks and pulls over in front of a house. He gets out and walks into the yard. Svetlana sees him pull an envelope out of his back pocket and take a quick look around before he drops it through the mail slot in the door. He makes his way back and hops in the truck. As they pull away, Svetlana sees the door open and a young girl holding the envelope. She can't help but notice the girl's curly, red hair. She'd recognize that color anywhere. She turns and faces forward as they leave Chicago behind and head into their future.

\----------

Debbie stands in the doorway watching the U-Haul truck as it pulls away from the curb. She can't help but wonder to herself why Mickey Milkovich would be dropping something off here. It's not like he hangs around here. She only ever remembered seeing him at the house when DCFS took them that day. She traces her finger along the back flap of the envelope, tempted to open it and see what's inside. But first, she flips it over to read what's inscribed on the front. 

"Please give to Ian when he returns."

She doesn't want to pry, so she brings it upstairs and hides it in her room. When Ian does eventually come home, she will do as Mickey's written words asked.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yevgeny is born.

Life in Pittsburgh wasn't bad at all. In fact, it was actually quite good. They had been there for over six months now and were both really enjoying it. Mickey's uncle Lonnie had hooked him up with a job at one of the local colleges, doing janitorial and facilities work. Svetlana had gotten a job as a receptionist at a doctor's office. Without the threat of Terry hanging over their heads, they both felt a lot more free to be themselves. Since they had no one else here, they formed a tight bond with each other. Mickey had never really known what it was to have a friend. Sure, he and Ian had an odd friendship of sorts, but their relationship always had ulterior motives. It was nice to be friends with someone where neither of them wanted anything from the other besides that. She had even taken to giving him a nickname, calling him Misha and letting him call her Lana. Mickey told Svetlana about his mother. She told him about her father selling her into prostitution. He told her everything about Ian. They had found out they were having a boy and started arguing about names. When she told him she wanted to call him Yevgeny and why, Mickey argued with her but ultimately relented. Truthfully, it didn't really matter to him. They slowly started stocking up on things for the baby's room. They lived their lives. 

Sometimes Svetlana would catch Mickey writing one of his letters. She never mentioned it to him because she knew he would get funny about it. She also noticed that he never received any back. She always wondered why, if the letters were being received, if Mickey threw them away instead of sending them. She never asked, never let on that she knew. Even with as close as they became, she knew that he still had his secrets. But everyone did, she wasn't going to hold it against him. Instead, she tried to do what any good friend would do. She tried to get him back out there in the dating world. She asked him if he had gay coworkers. She told him about her coworker's single, gay cousin. She tried to convince him to go to a gay bar she heard about. But nothing worked. He didn't yell or get mad like he would have back in Chicago. Just waved it off or didn't even acknowledge it at all.

One Saturday, they had ordered some pizza and Mickey was finishing up with painting Yev's room. They had picked out a nice green paint. He had done the brunt of the work but was in there doing touch ups. Svetlana kept trying to come in to supervise, but Mickey shooed her out, worried the paint fumes would bother her. As he's nearly finished, he hears Svetlana calling him. "Misha! MISHA!" He runs out of the room and finds her in the kitchen, looking like she peed herself. He isn't sure what is going on until she says, "My water, it broke! We must go to hospital!" He grabs the keys to the car they'd just bought, throws her coat over her shoulders, and helps her out of the apartment and down the stairs to the street. They were living in a neighborhood called Squirrel Hill. It had a few advantages. There was the Russian population which helped Svetlana to assimilate and find her job off the books. The Russians were big on helping their own. There was also the fact that it was right next to a big park, and was situated between where Mickey worked and where the hospital was. Mickey rushed them over as quickly as he could, and once Svetlana was admitted, all they could do was wait. Mickey didn't really know how to be comforting or reassuring, and was relieved that Svetlana was the way she was. She didn't need him to coddle her and he was grateful. When her contractions got really bad, he held her hand, he walked her around the hallway, he sat her up and rubbed her back. One of the nurses commented on how doting Mickey was, and Svetlana winked at him, replying, "He's not too bad. I could have done worse in a husband."

Finally it was time for the active labor and the doctor came in. Svetlana kept her cool, as usual. She wouldn't even let a thing like child labor break her. Mickey found it to be quite admirable, but he knew she was hurting. She pushed and pushed, squeezing Mickey's hand in her grip. A few times she even moaned in pain, but never yelled. With one last great push, Yevgeny burst into the world doing enough yelling for all of them. While the doctor and nurses were cleaning him up and attending to him, Mickey brushed the sweaty locks of Svetlana's bangs off of her forehead. When they brought Yevgeny over, they offered him to Mickey. He hesitated, not sure what to do. He had dreaded this day but now that it was here, it didn't seem so bad. Svetlana smiled at him encouragingly and said, "Go ahead. It's okay." He put his arms out in front of him and stiffened when they put Yev into them. A nurse showed him how to hold his arms to keep Yev's head higher. Mickey stared at him, fascinated by how small he was. Yev squirmed and opened his eyes. They were as bright and blue as Mickey's own, and the sight of them made Mickey realize this was real, this child was a part of him. The thought was so overwhelming that he had to sit on the edge of the bed. He felt a tear prickling at the corner of his eye, but for probably the only time in all of his life, he didn't try to hide it. _Holy shit, this must be what love feels like._ Mickey hands Yev to Svetlana and she gets emotional too. It is the only time that Mickey has seen her like this. He realizes that despite how this situation came to be, these are the two most important people in his world and that he loves them. The irony is not lost on him.

The next day, the doctor cleared Svetlana and Yevgeny to go home and they were discharged. Mickey was terrified. He didn't feel ready, didn't know how they were going to be as parents. He didn't even want to drive home from the hospital with the baby in the car, but Svetlana didn't have a license so there was no choice. They got to the house and Svetlana put Yevgeny in the bassinet Uncle Lonnie gave them as a gift. Mickey just stood and watched him as if he was going to get up to some mischief. Svetlana placed a hand on his arm and said, "Misha, he's fine. Let's order some dinner. Yana and Dennis are going to come by in a bit to see the baby." She waves a menu at him and he finally relents, dialing the place for some delivery. Their friends arrive just after the food and they all eat together, swooning over the baby and catching up. Yana and Svetlana met working together in the doctor's office and Dennis was her boyfriend. They knew the truth about Mickey and Svetlana's situation, the only people here in Pittsburgh who did. A few other people from the neighborhood that they had met stopped by, bringing them lots of food and praising them on how cute Yevgeny was. Even Uncle Lonnie came by to congratulate them. He pulled Mickey in for a brief hug and said, "When you're ready to move him into the crib, let me know. I've got a hook up, I'll get you a good price." Mickey claps him on the back and smiles. Uncle Lonnie was always solid, one of the few people in his family who was. About a month after Yev's birth, Mandy and Iggy came to visit for a weekend and meet their nephew. They brought some presents, took lots of pictures, it was a really nice weekend. But Mickey could feel the change in his relationships with them that being away for so long was causing. He was okay with it, though. He had known for a long time that he needed some distance from that chapter of his life. There was just too much hurt. Maybe in time it would be different. But for now, he just wanted to focus on this newer, happier life.

\----------

Debbie had taken to trying to get to the mail before anyone else did. She was always looking out for the letters. After Mickey had dropped off that first one, it was quiet for awhile until one day another letter appeared with a Pittsburgh stamp on it. There was no rhyme or reason to when they showed up, they just did. Debbie had started saving them all in a shoe box for Ian for whenever he returned. She didn't even know why she bothered, they had no idea when that would be. Hell, they didn't even know where he was. She had tried to push Fiona into reporting him missing or doing _something_ , but it was useless. She finally quit. At least he sent text messages to Fiona and Lip from time to time to let them know he was doing alright. She supposed that would have to be enough. She came home from school, shrugging off her coat and throwing it on the jacket hook. She noticed that the mail wasn't on the floor inside the door, and she found out why as she made her way into the house. Lip was in the kitchen flipping through the mail. He looks at an envelope and says, "Huh. A letter for Ian." Debbie snatches it and replies, "I'LL take that." Lip looks at her quizzically. "But it's for Ian." Debbie rolls her eyes and says, in a very snide voice, "Yes, I'm well aware, thank you. It's not the first one. I'm saving them for him for when he gets back." Lip tries to reach for it again and she pulls back from him. "Not your business, Lip." She takes the envelope and goes upstairs. She had known that one day this would happen, and had actually purchased a small safe with a lock code to hide Ian's letters in. She knew Fiona and Lip couldn't help themselves, and one of them would have opened a letter. She didn't know why Mickey kept sending these letters, but she knew how her older siblings felt about the Milkovich family. She didn't want to give them any ammunition to work with. Just the fact that these letters kept showing up endeared Debbie to Mickey. She spun the dial to open the safe and stuck the letter at the bottom of the pile. She made sure to keep them in order. It seemed important somehow.


	3. Chapter 3

Debbie hated math. She was always good at school, but math was just tedious and annoying, and she didn't want to deal with it. She was trudging through her homework while Liam nibbled at some fish sticks she had heated up for him for dinner. She was on babysitting duty, and no one else was home. She was concentrating on a particularly hard problem and didn't hear the front door open and close. All of a sudden there was a voice from the living room. "Whatcha studying?" She looks up and there is Ian. Debbie just stares at him, not believing he's really there. Finally she gets herself together and runs over, throwing her arms around him and crying. He laughs and scoops her into a bear hug. He feels Liam's little arms around his leg and reaches down to grab him up too. When Ian puts her down, she starts yelling at him. "Where the hell have you been all this time?! Two years and you never came home? What the fuck, Ian?!" He holds his hands up defensively. "Whoa, I was in the Army, Debs. Can't just pick up and come visit whenever I want." She pulls back and studies him. "The Army? You weren't old enough when you left." His face flushes with embarrassment and he replies, "Well, I may have pretended to be Lip to enroll. They found me out, but didn't want to embarrass themselves with word getting around that they let a minor enlist and didn't catch it for two years. So they let me off, no charges. But I can't ever enroll again. It's fine though, it wasn't what I thought. I'm kind of glad they finally caught on to me." Debbie doesn't know what to say, so she just moves on. "Are you hungry?" He shakes his head and says, "Nah, I'm fine. Is anyone else here?" She shakes her head and he continues. "Oh well, I'll see them when they get back I guess. I'm going to bring my stuff upstairs and relax for a bit." He heads up the back stairs and Debbie moves back to continue her homework. She's plugging away for a bit when she feels a bolt move through her. "Oh shit!"

She runs upstairs into her room and emerges with all of the letters. She goes to the boys' room and knocks on the door. When Ian calls her in, she opens the door and offers the handful of letters to him. He takes them and asks, "What's all this?" She looks at him and says, "Letters. They've been coming for you ever since you left. They're all from the same person." He cocks his head at her, a silent question. She knows exactly what he's asking. "Mickey Milkovich." Debbie could swear she sees him visibly pale at the mention of the name. "Excuse me?" She nods and explains. "The first one he dropped through our mail slot one day. Ever since, the rest of these have all arrived by mail. It's been a little while since he sent one though. They're in order." She hesitates for a moment before asking her next question. "Why'd you go to the Army in the first place?" Ian stares at the bundle of letters he's holding. "Relationship issues." She looks at him, finally understanding the reason for all those letters, before she leaves. He sits down on the bed and traces his finger over the writing on the first envelope. _Please give to Ian when he returns._ He never expected that Mickey's handwriting would be so precise, the letters sharp and purposeful, much like Mickey himself. Taking a breath, Ian opens the first envelope and starts reading.

_Ian, I'm sorry I couldn't be who you needed me to be. I'm sorry I pushed you away. You're gone and I have nothing here for me anymore. I'm leaving too. Svetlana and I agreed to make this work until she can get her citizenship. She's not so bad. We're moving to Pittsburgh. Need to get out of Chicago. Too many memories. I'm sure you know about that. Please stay safe. I'd really like to see you again one of these days. Mick_

Most of the letters are short notes, catching Ian up on what Pittsburgh is like, random memories and thoughts. He skims through these. But some snatches of words from the different letters make their way into his brain and take root.

_Yevgeny was born two days ago. I was so angry at having to be a dad, but Ian, when I saw him all that was gone. I didn't even know I could feel that way about a baby. He looks like me. It is scary but also fuckin' awesome. Svetlana has a girlfriend. Her name is Inessa. Can you believe it? Wait until the day comes that we have to try to explain all this gay, straight, sex bullshit to our kid. Fuck._

He gets to another envelope and can feel something extra inside. When he opens it, he sees there's a picture, but he doesn't look at it until after he reads the accompanying letter. _Today was Yev's first birthday. I can't believe he's a year old. I can't believe it's been over a year and a half since I've seen you. I miss you. I kept thinking today that I wished you could be here. Inessa made the cake for Yev, she works in a bakery. She's pretty cool and she's good with Yev so no complaints here. I hope you're staying safe. I haven't heard anything bad from Mandy, so no news is good news, right? If you're ever in danger, shoot first, ask questions later. I don't know why I'm giving you advice you won't see while you're away. Makes me feel better I guess. I'm sure you'll be fine though. I know you can shoot like a boss. Mick._ Ian finally looks at the picture and his heart skips a beat. It's Mickey holding Yev. There is no question that this is his son. He is a miniature version of Mickey, with lighter brown hair like his mother, but the _eyes_. There's no mistaking those eyes. Mickey is laughing and Yev is covered in frosting. Ian blinks rapidly as he feels the tears gathering in his eyes. All this time away and just like that, Mickey gets to him. He doesn't even have to be here to affect Ian. But clearly that works both ways if Mickey has been sending him letters with no replies for nearly two years. The last letter makes Ian storm out of the house to get some answers to his questions.

_Ian, I regret so much, every day. I don't know how I'm supposed to move on with my life. I hope you don't hate me._

Ian starts out briskly walking the few blocks to his destination, but winds up racing up the stairs of the all too familiar house. He bangs on the door and gets lucky. The person he's looking for opens the door. "Ian! You're home!" Mandy tries to hug him but he steps back and blocks her. "Pittsburgh, Mandy? PITTSBURGH? Your brother leaves and you don't even bother to mention it to me?" She waves at him to keep his voice down, motioning behind her. It's enough of a hint. She sighs and says, "I didn't think it would help anything to tell you. What were you going to do about it from where you were, Ian? How'd you find out anyway?" He glares, trying to keep his composure. "Because," he hisses, "He's been writing me letters and having them sent to my house for the past two years." Her eyes look like they're going to pop out of her head in shock. "WHAT?!" He nods and moves back towards the steps, sitting down. She sits next to him and they just stay there in silence for awhile. Finally, Ian speaks. "I need to see him." Mandy looks at him sharply and asks, "You sure that's a good idea? Not that Svetlana is an issue, they've just genuinely become friends over time and they co-parent Yev." He shrugs and replies, "Fuck if I know. But Mandy, he's been writing to me all this time. And actually speaking about things, his version of speaking at least. I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about him when I was gone. I need to know. I'd never forgive myself. You need to give me his address. He didn't put a return address on any of his letters." He sees her hesitation and before she can argue he surges forward. "PLEASE Mandy, don't fight me on this. I have to know. I HAVE to." She sees the urgency on his face and nods. She gets up and goes inside, emerging a couple of minutes later with Mickey's address written on a scrap of paper.

\----------

After living for nearly two years in Pittsburgh, Mickey had determined that his favorite times of year was summer, especially living as close to the park as they did. And he liked it even more since Yev was getting older and he could take him there to play. He was a year and a half now toddling around and getting into everything. Mickey loved to take him to the park and just let him loose on the grass, watching as he ran and fell, giggling all the while. They also had a playground area where Mickey would push him on the baby swings, eliciting shrieks of delight when he pushed him just a bit too high. He never did that when Svetlana came with them, however, after she had chewed him out for it. Becoming a dad also made Mickey much more of a morning person. He rarely slept in on weekends anymore, preferring to get up early and spend the day doing things with Yev. On this particular morning, he was getting some scrambled eggs on to a plate for Yev, who was sitting in his high chair rubbing at his eyes and squinting blearily. Mickey turned on the TV and put on some cartoons to distract Yev while he ate, dropping the plate and a fork in front of his son. Yev slowly picked at the eggs, still half sleeping. "Hey Yev, you want to go to the park today?" His son's eyes lit up and he nodded. "Park!" Mickey laughed and said, "Eat up little guy so we can get dressed and go!" Yev nodded agreeably and shoved some more egg in his mouth. Eventually, he finished and Mickey got him dressed. He left a note by the coffee pot for Svetlana and they were off to the park.

It wasn't even noon but it was pretty hot out already. Instead of the usual activities, Mickey directed Yev to a sprinkler installation that a bunch of kids were enjoying and let him loose. Yev laughed and ran back and forth through the sprinklers, cooling himself down and having a great time. Eventually, Mickey took him by the swings because he knew Yev would get upset without some swing time. But it wasn't long before he could see Yev's eyes drooping and he figured it was nap time. He lifted him from the swing and laid Yev's head on his shoulder, feeling his son's little arms around his neck. As he made his way down the street, baby in one arm and using the other hand to search his pockets for his keys, he almost didn't see the man in front of him, hunched over his phone looking at a map, shielding the screen from the glare of the afternoon sun. They nearly collided when Mickey jumped back and yelled, "Whoa!" What he saw almost made him drop Yev on the floor. The man looking at his phone was Ian. He held onto Yev tighter, as if he was a shield from the feelings Mickey was having in this moment. He was about to say something when he felt hands pulling Yev from his reach. He was about to lash out when he realized it was Svetlana. She gave Ian a nod and focused her attention back to Mickey. "Give Yev to me, I'll put him down for his nap. You two have a lot of catching up to do. Go ahead, go into town or something." She handed Mickey the car keys and patted his arm. As she went to move back towards their apartment building, he followed her a few steps and stopped her. He whispered, "I didn't know he was coming." She nods and says, "I know, it is obvious. But he's here. Go see why. It's fine. You deserve a life too, Misha." He watches as she makes her way inside with Yev and then he hears a voice behind him, quiet, tentative. "Can we talk?"


	4. Chapter 4

They wind up at a small diner near Mickey's job. It's just the type of greasy spoon place that Ian can see Mickey stopping in for coffee in the morning, or grabbing a quick lunch if he forgot to bring his to work. They sit in a booth in a back corner. For a long time, they are silent. Ian watches Mickey, while Mickey watches his coffee cup. Mickey traces his finger along the rim of his mug, occasionally picking it up and taking a sip, avoiding Ian's eyes. As he studies Mickey, he can't help but notice that even with the obvious discomfort at this situation, there is something about Mickey that is lighter. He doesn't have that same anger or tension in his face that he used to always carry with him. "You look good, Mick." Mickey nods and replies softly, "Thanks, you too." And he does. Mickey has tried his hardest not to stare Ian down, but he definitely checked him out more than once on the way to the diner. His time in the military built him up even more than he was before he had left. He was really a man now. Mickey thinks he might have even gotten a bit taller, if that was possible. 

Ian waits for Mickey to say more, but it doesn't happen. He knows that if they're going to be able to talk anything out, he's going to have to take the lead, but he's not surprised by this. "I got your letters. All of them. Debbie saved them for me." Mickey can't help but feel thankful for her right about now. He always wondered if Fiona or Lip hadn't gotten the letters and tossed them. He tucks the corner of his lip between his teeth and bites it gently. The gesture is so familiar for Ian to watch that it hurts. "Yea, I figured as much." Ian reaches into his pocket and takes out a folded piece of paper. He slides it across the table towards Mickey, who stares at it. Ian motions him to take it, and he does, opening it up. He reads the words from the last letter he had sent. _Ian, I regret so much, every day. I don't know how I'm supposed to move on with my life. I hope you don't hate me_. He folds the paper back up, clenching it in his hand. "Mick, are those words true?" Mickey scowled at him and replied, "Of course they're true. What kind of question is that?" Ian looks down at his hands and whispers, "Then why didn't you fight for us?" That set Mickey off and it is very clear that he is angry. That he may not think about it, but that anger is always lingering somewhere. He slams his hand down on the table and seethes through his clenched teeth. "Why didn't I... Really? You fuckin' kidding me right now? Fuck you, you don't understand. All this time and you still don't get it? I'm not doing this." He digs around in his pockets, throws a few bills down for his coffee and storms out of the diner. 

Ian chases after him and catches Mickey just as he's about to get in his car. Ian grabs his shoulder and spins him around so they're facing each other. "Mick, talk to me! For once, just talk to me! Don't run away." Mickey shoved Ian's hand off him and said, " _I'm_ not the one who ran away. That was _you_. With all the shit that happened, with Terry, with Svetlana, you just kept pushing and pushing me to talk to you. Like I wasn't just trying to get through each fuckin' day. LIKE I HAD A GODDAMN CHOICE IN ANYTHING THAT WAS HAPPENING. You really think I wanted to marry her? As soon as you didn't get the result you wanted, you fuckin' left. _You_ left. _Not_ me. I just needed time, but you didn't understand that and you never gave me a chance to get my shit sorted to be able to tell you that. _That's_ my regret. That I couldn't say how I felt. But you knew I didn't want you to go." He can feel the tears prickling, and he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes to will them away. He's not going to cry here in the middle of the street. When he thinks he's got himself under control, he continues. "Ian, do you have any idea how I felt when you left? I missed you like crazy. I felt so alone. I thought everything was going to crash down on me. I was drinking every day for a solid month, drowning my sorrows. I tried to get Svetlana to... I can't even say it. I don't even want to think it. She realized the pain I was in. She became my friend. She suggested we get away from all of it, and we did. I thought I was truly alone when you left, because I didn't think I'd have anyone else, until I realized I had her on my side. You don't get to talk to me about running away." His voice breaks at the last part and so does the tension between them. Mickey doesn't want to fight anymore. That's why he had left Chicago in the first place. Ian sees the hurt and pain Mickey is feeling just from reflecting on the past. He didn't come here to fight with Mickey either. Ian grabs Mickey and pulls him close. He wraps his arms around the shorter boy's shoulders and buries his face in his hair. "Mick, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I know I shouldn't have left. I fucked up." Mickey wraps his arms around Ian's waist and they just stay there holding each other. "I missed you so fuckin' much," Mickey whispers in his ear. Ian murmurs, "I missed you too."

Mickey feels his phone buzz in his pocket and he lets go of Ian to retrieve it. He sees from the screen that it's a text message from Svetlana. _Will you two be back for dinner?_ Mickey tells her they will and slips his phone back in his pocket. He looks at Ian and asks, "You hungry? Svetlana is picking up dinner." Ian shrugs but nods at the same time and Mickey unlocks his car so they can head back to the apartment. It doesn't take but a few minutes to get back there. Mickey pulls up at the curb and turns off the car. He looks at Ian and asks, "You okay meeting her? She's really not bad at all." Ian's nervous, but he's not about to admit it. He nods again and they step out of the car. Mickey moves ahead of him to open the door and holds it to let Ian follow. He leads Ian up a flight of stairs to the second floor and moves down the hall to the last door. Mickey opens the apartment door and steps inside, Ian slowly following behind him. He motions to Ian and says, "C'mon, I'll give you the tour. This is the living room, clearly." They move through the apartment and Mickey rattles off the rooms as he motions towards them. "There's the eat-in kitchen, Yev's room, Lana's room, bathroom, and my room." Ian can't help but notice how nice the apartment is, and the obvious effort given to keep it that way. This is definitely not like the Milkovich house back in Chicago. Mickey hears a muffled yell of _Misha_ from the hallway and motions Ian to sit at the dining table. "Wait here, that's Lana. She must have went to pick up the food." 

He goes and opens the door to let her in. She's got bags in both hands and is wearing Yev in one of those baby carriers. "Jesus, Lana, how much food did you get?" She sighs and replies, "I know, I know. I got too much. But Inessa is coming in little bit and also I have to cover a shift for Yana tomorrow, so now you won't need to cook. You're welcome." She absentmindedly pecks him on the cheek while he grabs the bags and brings them to the table where Ian is sitting. She starts to unstrap the baby carrier as Yev fusses to be set free in the apartment. Mickey figures it's time to get the introductions out of the way. "Lana, this is Ian. Ian, this is Svetlana. Yev's mom." They both nod awkwardly and try give each other a smile. Mickey thinks it's better than nothing. Luckily, Yev is always ready to provide a welcome distraction. Svetlana has put Yev down and he toddles his way over to Mickey, babbling away. "Da! Dada UP!" Mickey scoops him up and blows raspberries on his belly, causing Yev to scream and giggle. He nestles Yev into the crook of his arm and the baby proceeds to pat at his face. Mickey brings him closer to Ian and says, "And this is Yev." Ian loves kids and he can't help but smile and wave his fingers at him. Yev is clearly fascinated with this new person. "Yev, this is _Ian_. Can you say Ian?" Yev studies him silently and Mickey repeats the name a few times until Yev calls out "Eeeya! Eeeya!" Just like that, Ian is smitten and it seems Yev is too, because he reaches out for Ian to hold him. Mickey looks at Svetlana, surprised. He is a friendly baby, but he doesn't reach out for anyone besides his parents. Mickey looks to her for assurance and she smiles and motions him to give the baby to Ian. 

Ian entertains him while Mickey and Svetlana set about getting dinner on the table. Mickey starts unpacking the bags while Svetlana moves around, getting plates and silverware. They're about to sit down to eat when Inessa arrives and is introduced to Ian. They all get settled for dinner and make small talk, Ian mostly listening. Svetlana turns to him and says, "So Mickey tells me you are in the Army?" He replies, "Well, I was, but not anymore. I was discharged." She asks, "How come?" Ian pauses, thinking about how to best explain the circumstances of what happened, and figures it's best to just be honest about it. "Well, I was underage when I enlisted. I got a fake ID using my brother's information. I got away with it for over a year until I had started exhibiting some weird behavior. Eventually they evaluated me and determined that I have bipolar disorder. My mother has it too. They had started treating me and put me on inactive duty when they went to pull my medical records and somehow that's how they figured out I lied about who I was. Long story short, they didn't want to deal with the fallout if people found out how long I got away with that, so they agreed to pay for my therapy and meds and I agreed to be discharged with no chance of reenlisting as myself. The Army was my dream for a long time, but it really wasn't what I thought it would be, and I'm kind of glad it's done now." The conversation heads in another direction after that, and Ian is relieved that he doesn't have to explain any further. 

When they are done, Svetlana pulls Mickey aside and asks, "Do you think you could do the dishes and clean up? I have to get mine and Yev's stuff ready." Mickey looks confused and says, "What stuff? Ready for what?" She smirks and says, "We're staying at Inessa's tonight." Mickey still isn't understanding what she's implying and replies, "But why?" She rolls her eyes and hits his arm affectionately. "Misha, I have lived with you for two years. And for two years you have not had a date, you have not had a special friend, you have not picked up a man from a bar and brought him home for the night. You work, you are a good dad, but you do nothing for you. Nothing. For two years you have been alone because you missed your orange boy, and now he is here, sitting in our living room, playing with our son. But he didn't come here for that, he came here for _you_. He came all this way for you. Who am I to stand in the way of that? Now, you do the dishes, I am going to pack some clothes. Have fun with him tonight. Figure out the rest tomorrow." She pats his cheek and walks away. Mickey goes in the kitchen and starts cleaning everything up. He doesn't tell Ian what's happening, he's too nervous. He's almost done when Svetlana emerges with an overnight bag for her and Yev. She takes Yev from Ian and brings him over to Mickey to say goodbye. He realizes that this is the first time Yev is going to be away from him overnight and he feels emotional. He peppers Yev's cheeks with kisses and make Svetlana reassure him that she will call if she needs anything. As he turns his attention back to finish washing the dishes, he hears Svetlana saying goodbye to Ian and leaving. Mickey hears Ian approach and stop at the entrance to the kitchen. He can feel Ian watching, but he doesn't turn around. He finishes washing the dishes, turns off the water and puts his hands on the counter. He stands there for a moment, bracing himself, waiting. "Mick, can we finish talking?" He hears Ian's question, but he doesn't respond. He finally turns his head and looks at Ian. He allows himself to really look, to take it all in. Finally, he says, "No, we can't finish talking." With that, he moves across the kitchen in a flash. He steps to Ian and takes the taller boy's face in his hands, pulling him down and locking their lips together. 


	5. Chapter 5

Mickey and Ian fumble to get each others' clothes off while somehow remaining connected. They're tearing at each other and moving towards Mickey's room, tossing shirts and pants and boxer shorts every which way. Ian pushed Mickey down onto the bed and lays himself in between Mickey's legs, pressing their bodies flush against each other and kissing him deeply. He feels Mickey's erection, hot against his stomach. Mickey weaves his fingers into Ian's hair and turns his head so that he can trace a path of kisses along Ian's jawline. Mickey feels Ian turn them just enough so that he can reach around and grab Mickey's ass. He gives it a nice squeeze and slowly moves his hand so that he's pushing one finger into Mickey gently, testing him, teasing him. The reaction he gets from that alone is an even bigger turn on, and Ian finds himself getting up and running out into the living room to find his bag. Mickey watches from the bed as Ian rummages through the bag and produces lube. He continues to dig around and suddenly turns his bag upside down and pours the contents on the living room floor. He pushes everything back and forth with his free hand and yells, "FUCK." Mickey sits up and says, "What's going on in there?" Ian storms into the room, raking a hand through his hair, and replies, "I don't have any condoms. I could have sworn I had some in here. FUCK." He slams the lube down on the nightstand and Mickey says, "Calm down it's not a big deal. There's a corner store a few blocks up, I'll go get some." He moves to get up from the bed but Ian's already grabbing his own clothes off the floor. "No Mick, I'll run out. Just tell me where it is." Mick gives him the directions and his keys and Ian hustles out. 

While Ian is gone, Mickey starts to stroke himself lazily. He's trying to keep himself aroused enough to get right back into things, but not enough to push himself over the edge. At first, he was annoyed by the interruption, but as the minutes pass, he's starting to think that maybe the distraction was good. They had a lot of stuff to work through, but the sex was never one of their problems. Often, it was what they defaulted to so they could keep trying to avoid everything else. Two years and five hundred or so miles away from Chicago had given Mickey a lot more perspective on life, and he had grown in ways he didn't even realize. While he knew that he wanted to fuck Ian very badly, he also knew that he wanted to be smart about this and make sure that whatever did or didn't happen, they both went in with their eyes wide open. He stops touching himself and gets out of bed, grabbing his boxer shorts off the floor and putting them back on. He grabs the rest of his stuff and throws it in the laundry hamper in the bathroom. Finally, he grabs a couple of beers out of the refrigerator and goes to wait in the living room for Ian to return.

When Ian gets back, he certainly doesn't expect to find Mickey sitting on the couch. He stops in the doorway of the apartment, unsure how to proceed. Mickey grabs the second beer from the coffee table and holds it up for Ian. "Come sit with me, I think we have some things to talk about." Ian slowly moves into the apartment and takes the beer from Mickey's hand. He sits next to Mickey and says, "Thought you didn't want to talk." Mickey shrugs and replies, "I didn't, but I was a bit hasty before. Two years can do that to ya. But I was thinking while you were gone and I think that there's a lot we need to discuss." Ian nods and takes a sip of the beer. They start out with catching each other up on the past two years. Mickey talks frankly about that first month after Ian left, how terrible it was, how he and Svetlana finally realized how much better it would be for them to work together rather than against each other. How they moved to Pittsburgh, how they truly bonded and became friends and then parents together. He talks about his job and the friends he's made here, but he doesn't talk about his family. Ian talks about basic training, about getting sent overseas, how he started behaving very erratically and that led to his bipolar disorder being diagnosed. He told Mickey how he believed the onset came on due to all the things he was seeing being on active duty, and the agreement that he had come to with the Army for help with his treatment. 

As if he had summoned it, Ian's phone beeps. "That's my alarm to take my meds." He searches through his pile of stuff, still scattered on the floor, and Mickey gets up to get some water for him. He returns with a glass and sees Ian holding a couple of pills in his hand. He takes the water and swallows the pills, washing them down and putting the glass on the coffee table. Mickey sits down and notices that Ian's hand is shaking ever so slightly. Ian follows his gaze and says, "It's because of the meds. It'll pass soon enough." Mickey can see that Ian is self-conscious of this, and he takes Ian's hand and squeezes it to reassure him. Ian is surprised by such an overt sign of affection, but he is happy for it. He rubs his thumb over the tattooed knuckles and lays his head back on the couch. He senses Mickey watching him and he turns his head to look over. Mickey is in fact watching him, biting his lip, and Ian can tell he wants to say something. "Mick?" He says his name in a way that implies the question behind it, and Mickey understands what he's doing. "Ian, why did you come here?" Ian looks at him confused and replies, "Um, to see you. Why else?" Mickey shakes his head and says, "No, I know that. I mean bigger picture. Why did you come? What do you want?"

Ian gently pulls his hand out of Mickey's and quietly says, "I just want what I've always wanted. To be with you. There were so many times I wanted to write you while I was away, but I figured that you probably hated me after I left like I did. And when I got out of the army I didn't even come home right away. I traveled around a little because I was scared of what I was coming back to. I had no idea you'd left town. So when I finally did come home and Debbie gave me all those letters, I didn't want to waste any more time. I knew I had to see you, so I got on a bus and here I am." He looks down at his lap, nervous about how Mickey will react to his candor. "Look at me. Ian, look at me," Mickey says. When he finally does so, Mickey looks him straight in the eye and says, "I'm glad you came." Ian tears up and for a moment, Mickey sees that heartbroken boy from that day in the Kash and Grab, that boy who was told that he was nothing but a warm mouth. He sees that heartbroken boy watching him get married and causing a scene before he was dragged out of the reception. Two years and five hundred or so miles away from Chicago made Mickey realize he never wants to be that person again. Not everyone gets a second chance to make things right, and he'll be damned if he's not going to try.

Mickey gets off the couch and sits on the coffee table in front of Ian. He takes Ian's hands and says, "I want us to be able to make this work, but we need to make sure that we're on the same page about some things. I know you hate the fact that I married Svetlana, and I'm sorry about that. But she is still legally my wife. She and our son are my first priority. We've discussed getting a divorce down the road, but right now for legal purposes and my insurance through my job, that's not an option. Ian, you can't have a problem with that." Ian nods at this and Mickey continues. "You live in Chicago, I live in Pittsburgh. Do we want to try to work on this long distance?" Ian shakes his head and says, "I don't think that will really help us move forward." Mickey thinks for a moment before he continues. "You're probably right. But Chicago isn't an option for me anymore. I don't want to be near my father, and I can't be who you deserve there. We've put down roots here. I know I'm not giving you much in the way of options here." Ian says, "I'd be open to moving here. As long as you were willing to be open with me here." Mickey looks down and says, "I'll do my best. That's all I can promise." Ian chuckles at this and Mickey looks up at him, curious. "Mick, that's all I ever wanted from you. I never expected you to move mountains, or go to gay pride parades, I just wanted you to give me something, _anything_ to work with. I just don't want you looking over your shoulder all the time." He reaches over and brushes a lock of hair back from Mickey's forehead, tracing his hand down Mickey's face, running his fingers down and over Mickey's collarbone. He moves his hand to the back of Mickey's neck and pulls him forward gently until their lips meet. When they kissed before it felt urgent and needy. This feels more sure and ready. Ian breaks the kiss and stands up, pulling Mickey with him and moving towards the bedroom. 

Mickey undresses Ian before gently pushing him on the bed. He yanks his own boxers off and climbs on the bed, running his hands up Ian's body and leaning down to kiss him. He bites Ian's lip and drags his teeth as Ian pulls him down so their bodies are flush against each other. Ian manages to roll them over so that he is on top and kisses and bites a path along Mickey's jaw to his throat, sucking and biting on the soft skin until a small bruise appears. He moves down Mickey's chest, biting and kissing and licking, and Mickey can't help but moan in pleasure. Two years is a long time to go without, and when that is finally broken by the one person who's always meant so much to you, it's that much more intense. But before this goes any further, Mickey has one more thing on his mind. "Hey, hold on a minute, I have to ask you something," he says as he cups Ian's chin in his hand. Ian looks up at him, wondering what the hell he would be interrupting this moment for. Mickey looks off to the side, avoiding Ian's gaze, and says, "Look, I don't want to know what you were up to or who you were doing the past two years and it's not my business anyway. But I just need to know that you've been safe and you've been tested and shit." Part of Ian wants to laugh at how earnest Mickey is being about this, but he can tell it was hard for Mickey to even ask, and figures that may not be the best reaction. "Yes Mick, I've been tested and I'm clean. You?" Mickey nods and replies, "Same here." Ian smirks at him and says, "Good, can I get back to what I was doing?" Mickey laughs and lets go of Ian's face.

Ian finds the lube that he had left in there earlier and puts some on his fingers. He slides one finger into Mickey, noticing how tight he is. He had already figured out that Mickey probably hasn't had sex in awhile, but now he's starting to believe that Mickey hasn't really been taking care of himself this way either. His idea is pretty much confirmed when he slips a second finger in and Mickey hisses under his breath. He scissors his fingers slowly, wanting to give Mickey time to adjust, although he's an impatient fucker as he's always been. Mickey squirms and asks, "Hey man, you gonna just diddle around back there, or are you gonna get on me?" Ian can't help but feel amused at how little some things change, even after two years. He tears open the condom wrapper, rolls the condom down over his shaft and slicks some extra lube on. He pressed the head of his cock against Mickey's entrance and guides himself in slowly with one hand while he wraps the other around Mickey's waist. He leans down and presses his face between Mickey's shoulders, just breathing him in. When he finally bottoms out, he pauses there for just a second before slowly pulling back until he's nearly out, and pushes back in. As they adjust, they start moving faster and Mickey starts pushing himself back as Ian thrusts forward. Mickey feels Ian hitting his prostate and he can't control the moaning and talking coming out of his mouth. His words don't even make sense, but it doesn't matter, neither of them are listening. 

Mickey is so tight and Ian feels himself getting very close to his orgasm. He's trying to concentrate and make himself last a little longer but he knows he's losing the fight. He moves his hand from where he had it pressed on Mickey's stomach and wraps it around his cock. He starts to stroke Mickey, slowly at first but moving faster as he gets closer. Suddenly he lets out a long, stuttering moan as he comes. Mickey comes right behind him and they just stay where they are for a minute or two while they get their bearings again. Ian presses his forehead to Mickey's back and he feels a couple of hot tears slide out of his eyes. He didn't expect to be this overwhelmed, and he's just praying that Mickey doesn't notice it. Finally he pulls out of Mickey slowly and takes the condom off. He gets up and goes to throw it out in the bathroom. When he returns, Mickey is laying on his back. He looks at Ian and pats the bed next to him. Ian lays down but he tries not to be too on top of him, thinking of how they used to separate when they were done. Mickey starts absentmindedly playing with Ian's hair. "Missed ya," he says, his voice low and husky. Ian looks over at him and he can see that Mickey is feeling a lot of emotions just like he is. He rolls onto his side and presses his lips against Mickey's ear. He whispers, "I missed you too. But I won't leave again. I won't leave." Mickey rolls onto his own side, moving back until his back is against Ian's chest and stomach. Ian puts his arm around Mickey's waist and holds him close. He gently kisses behind Mickey's ear and whispers again. "Never again, Mick. I'm here." Mickey is out within minutes, but it's awhile before Ian falls asleep.


	6. Chapter 6

"I don't want you to leave."

Mickey watched as Ian moved through the bedroom, making sure he hadn't forgotten anything. They had spent the past few days holed up together. Svetlana had spent the time at Inessa's house, stopping by daily to have dinner with them and for Mickey to see Yev, but otherwise it had just been he and Ian. He had even faked sick and took a few days off from work to prolong it, but it was time for Ian to go back to Chicago. Since he had barely touched down at home, he had his own things to square away before making the move to Pittsburgh. Ian came over to the bed where Mickey was laying and gave him a lingering kiss. "I know Mick, but the sooner I go, the sooner I can come back here for good. Besides, you can't keep playing hooky at work. Get dressed, I'll make you some breakfast and you can take me to the train station on your way to work." He gently slapped Mickey's ass and left the room. Mickey laid there for another minute before finally getting up and moving into the bathroom for a quick shower. When he was done, he threw on his work uniform and went into the kitchen where Ian was plating waffles for the two of them, drowning in fruit and syrup. He crept up behind Ian and planted a kiss on the taller boy's shoulder. "You gonna cook like this for me all the time when you're here?" Ian shrugged and replied, "Maybe if you're nice. We'll see." They sat down and Mickey dove right into the food. He talked around a huge bite that he took. "If you do, you're going to fatten me right up man." Mickey had syrup on his chin and Ian leaned in to give him a kiss and run his tongue over the sweetness to get it off. He winked at Mickey and said, "More cushion for the pushin' and all that." 

This was what Mickey was going to miss. The banter, the company. Even the affection. It occurred to him that they had probably kissed more in the past few days then they ever had before Ian left. Mickey had never understood the big deal back then, but now that he had some affection, he wanted more. And he knew that Ian would be back and it would be fine, but his anxiety was piqued by the thought of the last time Ian had left him. It wasn't fair, but he couldn't help it. Ian picked up on Mickey's nerves and put a hand over his, stroking the tattooed fingers with his thumb. "Mick, I'll be back before you know it. A month, two on the outside. Just need to get my shit together, tie up loose ends, take my GED. Get doctor's referrals and shit. It won't be that bad." Mickey bit his lip and nodded, but didn't say anything. He grabbed their plates and washed them quickly before he realized that, like it or not, they had to leave if he was going to get to work on time. He grabbed his keys and wallet and they left. 

They spent the drive in silence, Mickey gripping the wheel so hard that his knuckles were white. They got to the train station and he parked in the lot, turning off the car and just staring out the window for a moment. He wasn't good at goodbye. Finally, Ian patted his knee and said, "It won't be that bad, Mick. I promise. I'll text you later." He hesitated for a moment before he grabbed his bag and got out of the car. Mickey knew this was supposed to be for his benefit. The version of himself that he left behind in Chicago would have never went for a flowery goodbye. He would have probably tried to punch Ian if he attempted anything. But that Mickey was two years and five hundred or so miles away. Mickey got out of the car and jogged after him. "Ian, wait!" As Ian was turning around, Mickey was there. He gently grabbed Ian's face and pulled him down, pressing their lips together. It took a moment for Ian to return the favor. Mickey ran his hand back and rubbed Ian's neck while Ian pulled him close. Mickey wrapped his arms around and gave Ian a hug, taking a deep breath and inhaling his scent. He didn't know when he'd get to do that again. "Get back here soon, you hear me?" Ian nodded against his shoulder. "And have a safe trip." Mickey gave him one more kiss before he finally let him go. He watched Ian until he couldn't see him anymore, and then he finally got back in his car and went to work.

Right about the time he got home from work, Mickey got a text from Ian that he had made it back to Chicago. He replied so that Ian would at least know he got the message. The affirmation made Mickey feel worse. It was real, Ian wasn't here. He moved into his bedroom and changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt. He noticed that Ian had left behind a sweatshirt. _He must have forgot it, I'll text him and let him know._ He realized that there was a paper taped onto it and he pulled it off to read it. _Keep this safe for me until I return. I want it back! I stole one of yours from your closet. $5 if you can figure out which one._ Mickey had to smirk at that. He supposed Ian must like the way he smelled too. He put the sweatshirt on and buried his nose inside for a moment, breathing Ian in. He laid back on his bed and just stared at the ceiling for awhile. He must have dozed off, because some time after he startled up to Yev patting his face. "Da! Dada hi!" Mickey tickled him and gave him kisses, causing Yev to giggle like crazy. Svetlana was in the doorway smiling. "Dinner is on the table if you want to eat," she said. He nodded and got up, picking Yev up and following Svetlana to the kitchen table. Mickey took a plate of food but he didn't really have much appetite. He pushed most of it around his plate, taking a bite here and there. Svetlana watched him like a hawk. She asked, "Did Ian make it back to Chicago okay?" Mickey nodded and she said, "That's good then. You miss him, I can see this." He just shrugged, not having the energy to bother with arguing. She looked at him thoughtfully and asked, "You love him?" He met her eye and considered her question. "I dunno. Maybe." She left him to clean up from dinner while she took Yev to be bathed. Mickey cleaned up, sat down on the couch and turned on the TV. A little while later, Svetlana returned with Yev so Mickey could say goodnight, and she laid him down in his room. She came back and sat on the couch with Mickey. They were quiet, just watching TV together for a bit. 

Eventually, Svetlana got up. "I'm going to sleep. If you miss him, call him. Show him that. It's okay now, we're not back there anymore. He will be back. He didn't come all this way to see you to just leave again. He loves you too, Misha. That's probably why he ran away in the first place. It was all just too much." The thing that never ceased to amaze Mickey in forming a friendship with her is that she knew him better than he knew himself. In just a few short sentences, she managed to put everything that had been swirling around his brain into words in a way that he couldn't. She dropped a kiss on top of his head and she went into her room. Mickey was nervous about being too clingy, so he didn't call Ian but he did text him. _Going to bed soon. Just wanted to say goodnight. Wish you were here, we could have some fun ;)_ A few minutes later, his phone beeped in response. _Wish I was there too. Broke the news to my fam that I wasn't staying in Chicago. Went better than I expected. Guess they're relieved I didn't just take off this time. Going tomorrow to find out about GED course and calling my docs for appointments. I'll let you know how it goes._ Mickey sent back some smiley emoji and went to bed.

And that's how it went for a few weeks. They would text on and off throughout the day, random updates, little nuances, things that reminded one of the other. At night, usually there would be a phone call, unless Ian got caught up with something. Six people living together in one house, there was inevitably always something happening. Ian had gotten study materials for the GED and was taking practice tests constantly, wanting to make sure that when he sat for the real test, he passed it the first time. He had his doctor appointments to get referrals for local doctors in Pittsburgh. He was slowly packing up the stuff he didn't need, sending it ahead to Mickey's house so that he could minimize what he had to bring with him when he came once and for all. Mickey was trying to convince Ian to just stay with him and Svetlana, but Ian wouldn't have it. He didn't want to rely on them. So for now, they were just trying to help find a place he could live and a job for him when he was finally out here. As luck would have it, Dennis proposed to Yana and the two of them were moving in together. His room in the apartment he was sharing would be available in a few weeks and the roommate, Mark, was more than happy to have Ian move in if he wanted. Mickey knew that Dennis didn't pay a lot for rent, so he encouraged Ian to jump at it. He knew Ian still needed to find a job, but he figured he could help him a little if need be. He had reached out to his uncle and was waiting to hear back if he knew of anything. Uncle Lonnie did better than that. He actually offered to hire Ian himself on good faith as his own assistant. He owned a few warehouses and said that he could use the help with the oversight and office duties. Mickey told Ian about the job and he accepted right away. He had finally taken the GED exam and was just waiting to receive his results before he finally left. 

Mickey was on his lunch break at work when his phone rang. He checked the caller ID and it was Ian. His hackles went up right away. Ian never called him when he was at work, so he was sure something happened. He picked up and immediately said, "What's wrong?" Thankfully, Ian laughed on the other end and said, "Shit, Mick. Why is it always the worst case scenario with you?" Mickey took a breath, relieved at Ian's amusement. "You never call me when I'm at work, so I just assumed." He heard realization in Ian's voice. "Sorry, I didn't even think about that. No, nothing's wrong. Well actually, I mean I hope nothing is. I got my GED results. I didn't open them yet. Wanted to do it with you." _Moment of truth,_ Mickey thought to himself. "Well fuck Ian, open the damn envelope and let's see what it says." He could hear the paper ripping through the phone and Ian mumbling as he scanned through the information until he found what he wanted. "I passed." Mickey jumped up from his seat and pumped his fist. "I'm really happy to hear that. Now get your ass back here already. Can you come this weekend? Dennis is out of the apartment, and he left his furniture so you don't even need to bring yours from home. Just clothes and possessions, and judging from all the boxes of shit in my room, I'd hope you don't have much left." Ian laughed and said, "I think I can head there this weekend. Let me just make sure I have nothing left to deal with and I'll let you know later. I'll call you tonight, get back to work." Mickey agreed and the line disconnected. For the first time since Ian left, Mickey felt real excitement. There was an end in sight to this separation. When he got home, he filled Svetlana in on the latest developments and she seemed excited as well. As he was about to fall asleep, his phone beeped. He had received a picture message from Ian. He opened it, expecting something dirty (they did that occasionally) but instead it was a receipt. A receipt for a train ticket for the upcoming Friday, which was three days away. He was about to respond when he got a follow up text message. _Should get to Pittsburgh about an hour after you get out of work. Pick me up at the station and take me to dinner?_ Mickey pecked at his phone and sent his response.

_I thought you'd never ask._

Friday finally came around and Mickey could barely focus at work. He just wanted to get the day over with so that he could go pick Ian up. He had messaged Mickey that morning to let him know he was getting on his train. Svetlana had told him that morning that she was going to take Yev and spend the night with Inessa, so that they could have the apartment to themselves. Mickey was very grateful that she was so understanding. He had already brought all of Ian's stuff to his new place for him to contend with, and Lonnie was going to let Ian start work the following week so that he could get settled. When it was finally time for him to leave, Mickey rushed home so that he could change out of his work clothes before he picked Ian up. He cleaned up and threw on his best jeans and a button down shirt, fussing over his hair before he realized he had to leave or Ian would be left waiting. He got to the parking lot where they had last seen each other and he got out of the car, pacing around and smoking a cigarette. He kept his eyes on the door to the station, waiting for his tall redhead to emerge. Just when he was close to messaging Ian to find out where he was, he saw him come out of the station. He could feel the cheesy grin spreading across his face, and he didn't care. That made him smile even bigger. Pittsburgh was freedom for Mickey. He waved his arms to get Ian's attention, and Ian headed in his direction. At first Ian was walking, but then he started to move faster until he ran up and nearly tackled Mickey against his car. They were kissing and hugging and laughing, and Mickey thought that he could spend every day like this. He pressed his lips against Ian's ear and whispered, "Welcome home."

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr [here](http://grumblesandmumbles.tumblr.com).


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